Processing...

Dear Pierce ... (following the recent events in Charlottesville)

As I told you this morning, some awful things took place in Charlottesville, the home of my alma mater, this weekend. People came to spread hate and that is not okay. We have to stand up to hate. As a person of color, your life will be riddled with these moments so you will mostly not be surprised when something like this happens and you won't utter words such as "I just can't believe this still happens in this day and age". You are still early in your life, but I know you see the world around you. You are developing your own sense of self and are picking up on things about our country, its people, and its history along the way. As your mom, I must always tell you the truth. This is not to discourage you, but to make sure you are not blindsided on your journey through life. 

You are biracial and are all the best parts of me and your father, but some people will judge you because of your blackness. Don't let people underestimate you. Don't let people tell you that you're not good enough, that you can't achieve greatness, or that you are inferior because they can't see past your skin color. Their minds are small. Don't let small minded people make you cynical or worse. Live and lead with love and optimism. Help and educate those who are open and don't know better, and the others ... well, you decide if they are worth your energy, time, and goodness.

You will get tired of being asked to be a spokesperson for black people or for biracial people. You will get tired of the race based questions because you may be the first person of color they've met or befriended. You will get tired of the head swivel in class when topics of race, slavery, Africa, or the civil rights movement come up. Just take a deep breath and try to be patient. Remember and embrace the fact that you come from amazing people. You come from a long line of strong, smart, resilient people. We have and will always be fighters and survivors. Your grandmother was a civil rights activist who integrated her middle school, desegregated the movie theater across from her alma mater Morgan State University, was a member of SNCC and served in the State Department starting in the 1960s when there were not a lot of people who looked like her. Your grandfather left Nigeria during the Biafra War to pursue his education in the United States. There were many times when he did not know if his family was still alive, but he pushed on so he could be in a better position to help them. He faced prejudice and racism at his colleges, but he persisted because that is what we do. 

People still try to stereotype me and put me in a box. They try to tell me who I am or who I should be based on the color of my skin. They assume things about me and about my life. They let the media's depictions of black people and the narrative about black women inform their assumptions about me without taking the time to learn my story and see my heart. Some people like to say that they don't see color, but I know they do because I have felt it, been judged by it, and have had people treat me in ways based on my race. If they don't see color, then they are ignoring our history, pain, persecution, fight, drive, persistence, strength, and amazingness. Yes, we are amazing. No matter how many times we get knocked down, we get back up because we have to. Always remember that no matter how hard it may get or feel, there is so much good in the world and in people. There will always be light within the darkness and love must always be louder than hate. Don't let the magnitude of state of things make you feel helpless. There is always something that can be done. Use your voice and always be about something. Stand up for what you believe in and never play small. Change can be made one person at a time, one act at a time. I love you. You are amazing. You are enough. You are destined for great things. Always go after your dreams. Always embrace and love who you are. Stay strong. 

Love,

Mom